The Gift of the Water God
by Raphael Fitchburne
Summary: Water Gods have been an object of fascination for Takahiro because they are everlasting. This trait that defies time he wants to obtain for himself to be with the one he loves: Alpha, a female android who is bound to never age.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Takahiro

I became obsessed with the Water Gods. There was one attribute of these living statues that so captivated me: they were everlasting. When I was still a boy, Ayase told me about how he visited places in the North and the West and found villages where people worship these statues. He would go on telling me about how the statues were human-like and exuded the feeling that they were waiting for something, always gazing far beyond the horizon.

"The old folks say they grew out the ground one morning and stopped changing, like a memory printed on paper," Ayase said. "Perfectly white. Soft to the touch like cotton. When you look at their eyes, you will not be able to distinguish them apart from human beings. They are phenomena worthy of worship." He looked away with a noticeable blush on his face, embarrassed about how poetic he sounded every time he shared his experiences with the Water Gods. Almost as if on cue, his Kamas went out of his bag and launched itself into the air. If this were any other day, the Kamas's slick body and long grinning snout, transparent wings and silver skin, and peculiar tinted sun visors would always catch my eyes, which would give Ayase a reason to turn the topic elsewhere. I did not let myself get distracted.

"Is it some kind of plant? What do you think?" I asked. I poised my hand to write down his answer.

Ayase glanced at the pocket notebook on my lap. "Some kind of research paper?"

Shrugging it off, I said, "You could say that. So?"

He looked up at the sky and rubbed his beard. "Honestly, I don't know. I've never really seen them up close. I always maintain a distance when I'm watching them."

"That so? Then I guess it's up to me to find out."

"What are you going to do with that knowledge? It's not like you can change anything."

I smiled. "I'm not really sure yet."

…

As if I could tell him my ulterior motive. On my way back, I passed by Alpha's House. Its coffee shop had been destroyed by the recent typhoon. It was quiet today as it had been ever since Alpha went away last month. She did not tell how long it would take her, or if she was even going back. She left the keys to her house to Jii-san, and when I heard about that, I volunteered to do its regular maintenance.

The chime clinked when I opened the front door. The room was the same as I had left it last week. I got the broom, the mop, and the cleaning rag I had stowed inside the storage room and started cleaning the house. It was Alpha's room next. "Excuse me for the intrusion," I said out of habit. I inhaled the air before entering and smelled Alpha's scent. I looked around her room and saw the decorations hanging on her walls. Wooden plaques of fish painted vividly with abstract markings. Frames with paintings of fishes. Sculptures of fishes on her reading table and closet. I slightly panicked when I felt that my eyes began to well up. "I should start cleaning," I said.

I stopped when I reached her bed and imagined her sleeping face. Without her knowledge, I always watched her when she slept every time I had the chance of staying overnight. And without her knowledge, I always put a kiss on her cheek before I went back to sleep. I reached out to her pillow and caressed its softness. Then I took it in my arms and hugged it. I could feel her again. Her warm body against mine. Her soft cheeks on my neck. The smell of her shampoo that never failed to make me feel hot. Only one month of never seeing her and I missed her so much already. What a hopeless man I was.

…

I met Alpha when I was nine years old, and I never thought of her other than an older sister. I frequented her place where I got my first taste of coffee that Jii-san warned me not to drink until I was twelve. I was her youngest regular customer. We grew closer up to the point where I could spend my days in her house like it was my own. We shared our days together like a family. We laughed over things, cried over things, got angry over things. We never kept a secret. I wished that our days would go on forever and I knew she wanted the same. I was still naïve, so the concept of our difference had never occurred to me just yet.

I was never expecting that how I looked at her would change so suddenly. One night after we both got drenched in the rain, she innocently invited me to take a bath with her, reasoning that we might catch a cold. I was thirteen at that time, and my puberty was at its peak. She nonchalantly sat beside me in the small bathtub. The bare skin of our arms touched. I felt some kind of warmth rising in my midsection. I only got it every morning when it was time for me to wake up and use the toilet. But it reacted when her skin touched mine. She also felt the awkwardness of the situation, given how stiff she was beside me.

"The heat is turning me red," I said, though I knew what the biggest factor was. If we both lost our cool, I was sure we wouldn't be able to look at each other in the morning.

"It is. We can probably get out soon," she said. "It just occurred to me. I probably couldn't have caught a cold, could I?"

Her words made my heart skip a beat. I did not know if she meant it, but all the same, its effect on me was tremendous.

"I'm going out first," she said and stood up from the bathtub.

It was no use. I could not look away anymore. Our eyes met in the mirror. She knew I was watching her naked body. I saw how her hands moved towards her breasts and crotch but stopped midway. Without covering herself, she went out of the bathroom with her head bowed.

I was still shocked as Alpha brought a sweater to me. I sat on her bed in a daze.

"Your clothes will probably be dry by tomorrow. You'll have to wait till then," Alpha said. She was leaning on the door as if saying, "You'll have to stay for the night."

I could not answer her immediately, but I managed an "okay" after ten seconds. My heart was drumming loudly in my chest as I searched the room for something to focus my attention on. Even Alpha had grown silent.

"Takahiro, you know…"

"Y-yes!" I gripped the bed sheet as I waited for her to continue. Her eyes were downcast, and I could see that her skin from her forehead to her neck was red.

The doorbell rang. We both jumped at the sudden intrusion.

"Ah! Let me see who it is," she said.

Turned out that it was Jii-san who came to fetch me. It was unfair of me, but I did not go to her house for a couple of months after that day. It got something to do with me trying out the saying "time heals all wounds" or something. I was hoping that our absence from each other's notice would erase the awkwardness between us.

I was wrong. The next time I saw Alpha, she acted cheerful towards me, same as she had been. Chatty and carefree. I felt different. The whole time I was with her, my heart did not let up with its intense beating. I was overly conscious of her. I ended up going home even though I had planned on staying over at her place. I realized I was not seeing her as an older sister anymore.

…

I was here again at Koumi'ishi-sensei's house. I had asked her to teach me about robotics and to tell no one about it. She had gladly accepted my request, reasoning that she could never have found a better student. Every morning when I was not at Alpha's place, I poured all my time to studying Sensei's old books, notes, and blueprints. With nothing to distract me from it, I quickly learned the basic concepts of robotics engineering and its applications.

I only told Jii-san, Makki, and her folks that I started to study about engines. They thought what I was interested in were the bigger ones, like automobile and aircraft engines. I let it at that. Koumi'ishi-sensei had also been an aeronautical engineer anyway so it wouldn't have been strange if I introduced her as my teacher. If I was not around, they knew where they could find me.

As I looked at Sensei's notes on A2 and A3's bio-robotics attributes, I was reminded of a conversation that had taken place the first time Makki and Alpha met. Alpha had brought us to a ramen shop for dinner. I excused myself for a bit to use the toilet and when I returned, I overheard their conversation.

"Do you like Takahiro?" Makki said.

"Huh?!"

"Because he really likes you."

"Makki-chan likes Takahiro, huh," Alpha said.

"I-it's not like that!"

"Well, I like him, too. But the thing is…" She sighed. "I envy you Makki-chan. You and Takahiro are part of the same generation. I'm with you for now, but I don't know how long I'll be able to say I'm part of your generation. Your time and your body are riding on the same ship with Takahiro, while I am only watching your ship from the shore."

I understood what Alpha was trying to say. She was saying that sooner or later we would leave her behind. We would mature and grow old while she would stay the same no matter how many years passed by. I wouldn't say that she was unfair. But it hurt me all the same. That time I became aware of our difference. Of where I was and where she was, of the limited time I could be with her. Of the impossibility of sharing my life with her.

On our way home that day, the idea that there might be a way that I could extend my life or stop my aging altogether blossomed in my mind. That was the reason I turned to Sensei for help.

…

Sensei and I were eating dinner together. Fried fish, egg, and mashed potato. She also brought out a partially full bottle of sake.

"You don't mind if you join me? You are already fifteen, aren't you? Sooner or later you'll have to learn to take a cup for something," she said, stretching her wrinkled face into a smile.

"I don't mind. I join Jii-san on cold nights."

After we finish eating, Sensei took the bottle to the veranda and set two wine cups and a plate of sliced lemon on the table. We watched the darkness of the evening and the violently brilliant star-studded sky.

"You no longer look like a kid," Sensei said. "It's scary how time goes by so fast."

"Yeah. Sometime soon, everyone will be leaving." I could not help but feel sadness at the notion.

Her hand went to my head. "Fast but not that fast. It will still be awhile before a significant change occurs."

"Even so…"

Sensei cut my brooding with a laugh. "I heard from Alpha that you've met the Misago."

"The Misago, huh. Yeah. It was six years ago. I've never seen her again."

"My great-grandfather had also seen her. Some historians speculate that she might have been the first robot, but there is also a popular theory that she is the last human being of the old world. I'm partial to this theory. As one of the scientists who developed the Alpha Series, I'm well read about the history of robots. It would have been impossible to create a robot as perfect as the Misago one hundred years ago. The development of androids started in my grandfather's generation. Most of their creations did not have sophisticated personalities like what the Alpha Series have. As far as I'm concerned, it is impossible that the Misago could have been created much earlier."

"One hundred years? You mean the Misago has been here for one hundred years?"

"One documented sighting of her dates back 103 years ago. She was depicted as a naked woman who could jump over a ten-story building in one go."

I blinked, turned towards the wilderness, and drank my sake. "I wonder what she is doing now."

A lulling silence came between us. Sensei started the conversation again after we finished three cups.

"Maybe she knows the secret of what you are searching for."

"Maybe—wait, how did you know about that?"

"Takahiro, I will be honest with you. This generation does not have the capability anymore to create robots. I am the only remaining specialist in the field. The last laboratory for the research and development of robots was destroyed by a tsunami twenty-three years ago. I don't have the tools anymore to make a mechanical organ for you."

"That's okay, Sensei. But I will never give up. Alpha…how old is she?"

"A7M2 Alpha has the body of a twenty-one-year-old girl. But experience-wise, she's just slightly older than you."

"I see. Then I still have time."

Sensei reached out for my hand. "It is a blessing for me that I met you but remember this. If you don't wake up when it is too late, both you and Alpha will get hurt real bad. You can continue to pursue your dream, but please be aware of the time you have to let go if it is not realistic anymore. You are like a son to me, and Alpha is like my daughter. I don't want either of you to suffer."

"I will remember that, Sensei."

Sensei smiled and raised her sake cup. "Nevertheless, as a researcher, I always root for people who pursue something new. I give you my blessing and wish you all the luck you can have."

"Thank you, Sensei."

I did not go home that night, opting to stay to spend some more hours reading inside Sensei's library.

…

It was dusk, and I decided to make camp on a ledge covered by susuri grass. The sky was the color of diluted indigo with feathery clouds which fringes reflected the remaining light of the sun. Two arms away beside me was a Water God. It looked like a sleeping baby. I had investigated it this morning. It was pure white without blemish and soft to the touch like a clump of silk. I had gotten a weird reaction when I squeezed it. It was filled with liquid. I thought about cutting it with a knife, but even if I was dying of curiosity for what might be inside it, I still chose to uphold my promise to its caretakers. Besides, I too was now convinced that this mysterious mushroom was alive as human beings were alive.

I roasted some fish on my fire and watched the smoke as it ascended into the sky. The word everlasting once again floated to my mind. Who decided that humans could not live forever? Who decided that robots should not age? People took these facts for granted because nobody could ever dispute them. But I was sure that in the past some people had tried doing what I was doing. Sometimes I thought that the creators of robots were unfair, but thinking of it that way, I could not help but think that our own creators were the same.

I was woken up from sleep when I heard rustles near me. I popped my head out of my sleeping bag and looked around. A baby fox was limping towards the Water God. I turned to my side to watch what it was doing. The pup bit the side of the Water God. I almost jumped up from my position. I wanted to throw something at it to shoo it away. But then I realized how bad the pup's condition was. It was mangy, its ribs were showing, and I could tell it had not eaten for days from the way it swayed on its feet. The pup licked the wound it made on the Water God, and I let it had its fill. I returned back to sleep. The next morning when I woke up, the Water God had disappeared.

…

Ojii-san still could not move around that much because he had hurt his leg a while back. I had told him that I would take care of the gas station. Fortunately, he was not your average stubborn old man. He listened to me, and most of the time I manned the gas station, selling daikon and gasoline or corn and gasoline. The sun blazed as it had been this past couple of weeks. I had not sold any pint since two days ago. Some grannies came by from the market but only bought daikon. I could say it was business as usual. I figured I might as well take a nap and wait out this heat.

"Boo!"

I blinked at the person in front of me and my eyes widened. "Alpha!"

She was wearing her green vest over her white blouse and her backpack. Her overcoat was hanging from her left arm. The gleam of her ruby earrings washed away my sleepiness.

"Hehe, long time no see!" she said. She placed her hand on her green hair in embarrassment. That smile, I missed it.

"Welcome back," I said.

"I'm home." She looked around the gas station. "You're helping at the shop."

"Maybe about half and half with grandpa. It's mostly daikon sold than gas these days." Her eyes turned towards the daikon shelf, and her expression softened. "That's great."

For a moment, I could only stare at her. I was captivated, and I felt like it was a sin not to. Was it her fault for being cute? Or was it just my longing gushing out after more than a year of not seeing her?

"Oh, I'll bring a chair. You want something to drink?"

"Yes, please."

"Here, there was nothing but tea," I said, showing the can of barley tea to her.

"Thanks…" Her words trailed, and she tilted her head up to look at me. I thought I got dirt on my forehead.

"Ah, here, the tea," I said.

It woke her up from her daze. She grabbed the can of tea in my hand.

"Your height…you grew taller again. I'm surprised!"

"Mhm." I placed the chair beside mine which Alpha accepted with pleasure. "So, one year, huh, though it felt like you were gone longer than that. But I also feel like I just met you the day before yesterday."

"Yeah…Hey, your voice! Isn't it deeper?"

Same as always. She noticed way more details than your average girl.

"Well, a bit," I said. "At first it turned into a strange scratchy voice. After a bit, at high pitches, my voice wouldn't come out right."

"I see," she said, slumping on her seat. She seemed regretful as if she lost a bet. "Somehow, I can't behave like I'm an elder sister to you anymore."

"Then don't," I said, reflexively, causing her to look up. Our eyes met, and then she dropped her gaze. I realized too late what I had said. "No such thing!"

She was flustered for a few seconds, her blush accentuating her small face. She looked up at me. I erased every trace of embarrassment from my expression and smiled. Recovered, she blew her bangs up.

"Well, I have to open up my house before the sun sets," she said as she put on her overcoat. "Thanks."

"Yup." I stood up from my chair. "Here. Give me your empty can." I reached out for the can and accidentally touched her hand. She pulled her hand as if it was burnt. The can fell and clanged on the pavement. Both of us bent over to pick it up, but in doing so, our heads bumped.

"Sorry," I said.

She stood away from me, shaking her head, eyes averted. She held the hand I had accidentally touched to her chest as if I might snatch it away from her. "No, I should be the one apologizing."

The awkwardness between us escalated, and I groped for the words to change the atmosphere. "Oh yeah. I have to return your bike."

"Oh, you can do it anytime."

"I came with the truck today. Should I give you a ride home?"

"Truck? So, you can drive already?"

"Well…"

She put on her hat and made a sideways glance at me. "Umm…but I think I'll walk today. Sorry. Give me a ride next time."

I could feel my heart beating like crazy at the sight of her. All I could think about was catching that moment and keeping it forever. I wanted to reach out, hold and pull her face close. I chose to put my hands in my pockets.

"I see. Well, then, next time," I said.

"Mm!"

I watched her as she walked away from me. "I'll tell grandpa, too!"

"Thanks!" she said. She raised her hand and waved.

Even though she had already disappeared from sight, I kept on watching. Somewhere deep within, I was hoping she forgot something and would soon return.

…

I found a spring coming from the cleavage of a rock. It flowed down to an old concrete trough, flowed over to a small pond, then to another pond, and another, making a chain until it trickled out onto a snaking stream less than the width of my palm. I drank a handful of water. It was cold and tasted like moss, but my tongue did not complain about it. I sat down to get my packed lunch from my backpack when my eyes caught the sight of a Water God. It looked like a white tadpole the size of a six-year-old child. Its chin was tucked into its chest as if it fell asleep standing. Another sound shifted my attention to my right, and I saw the same baby fox I had seen before ambling out of the bushes towards the first pond. It dipped its head and licked the water. Watching it from my position, I wondered if my eyes were not playing tricks on me. It had been five months since I saw the baby fox, but apart from its healthy appearance and snowy white fur, it had not changed a bit.

…

I parked Alpha's bike near the fish weather vane of her shop. It was past noon, and the sun was giving off warmth that made you sleepy. I wondered if the shop was busy since I did not hear Alpha coming down to greet me.

"Hello," I called out as I opened the door of the shop. No customer was around, and at the table beside the window, Alpha was sleeping. I thought of calling out again to wake her up, but I stopped myself. I silently approached her table, pulled out a chair, and watched her. I had done this so many times now, but I was still not tired of it. Alpha had her cheek on a hand cloth. She was snoring lightly. The afternoon sunlight coming in through the window illuminated her bare arms. I placed my chin on my palm, thinking if I should help myself to some coffee.

After a few minutes, Alpha stirred. She straightened up and stared at me with drowsy eyes. It took a few seconds before she realized it was me.

"Takahiro!"

"Yo!"

"Why didn't you wake me up?"

"Sorry. I thought I should let you rest."

"Man, that was embarrassing."

"Alpha," I said and then pointed to the side of my mouth. Alpha reddened, turned around, and wiped her mouth with her arm. "I'm just kidding."

"You!" She lunged at me. We ended up on the floor. I was laughing while she stretched my cheeks. She used to do this when I was younger, and that joke had been an attempt to provoke her to do it again.

I grabbed her hands and watched her as she sat on my stomach. Still holding her hands, I sat up. Our faces were just an inch away.

"Geez," she said.

"Now that I'm looking at you this close, I can finally see how you've grown even more…" I let my words linger.

She lifted an eyebrow.

I squeezed her hands. "Even more…beautiful."

She abruptly stood up and made a show of dusting her shorts. "I'll make you some coffee." Without giving me a hand to stand up, she went behind the counter and began to boil water.

She set a cup of black coffee in front of me. I waited for her to make coffee for herself and sit across from me like she usually did, but she just went back behind the counter and started wiping the cups. I watched her in wonder for a while.

"Hey, thanks for letting me keep your bike while you were away," I said.

"I thought it was better if somebody took care of it. You've actually done me a big favor."

"I see. Have Makki visited you? She told me that she wanted to see you."

"Makki? Nope. Only Ojii-san dropped by."

I sipped some coffee and watched the swaying grass outside. With only the sound of the hand cloth rubbing the porcelain cups and the clink of the cups when Alpha put them down, this day was turning out to be one of those days when I usually had an afternoon nap.

"Makki has also grown bigger. I can't treat her like a little sister anymore," I said. "In five years—no, three—I'm sure she will grow into a beautiful woman. She will make a good wife."

"I see," Alpha said.

I watched her reaction, and I saw, even though it was small and fleeting, the way one corner of her mouth twitched.

"Alpha, why don't you bring a cup over and join me here? I want to hear about your travel. I also want to tell you that I did my own traveling while you were gone." I stopped. Alpha was looking at the clock. "What's wrong?"

"Actually, um, I need to close shop early today. I have an errand to attend to," she said. "Sorry, Takahiro."

I looked away and giggled. I knew it was kind of mean of me to talk fondly about another girl in front of her. I always made sure that my actions indirectly told her that she was the most special girl in my life. I felt guilty but relieved at the same time. I guess I had to pack up for now.

"Alright. I'll visit again."

"Sorry…" she said.

Usually, she would see me off from the shop's door. It did not happen today. I laughed. What a jerk I was. Man, I was falling for her more and more.

…

I had arranged with Alpha to meet at the shrine at Dai no Hara today. Her words were, "I have something that I want to show Takahiro no matter what. I would like you to come. I will be waiting." Something she wanted to show me. My imagination flew off into the night that had started everything. Her naked body in the mirror. Her red face and ears. I shook my head. No way. Alpha wouldn't be like that. I lightly knocked the steering wheel with my forehead.

Alpha was waiting beneath a thick clump of bamboo trees just beside the torii to Dai no Hara. She was wearing a simple yellow blouse and blazer, long skirt, black leggings, and boots. On her head was a cute beret that matched her outfit. When she saw my truck trudging down the dirt road, she called out to me. I raised my hand in reply.

"I'm so glad! I was beginning to think you weren't going to come," she said.

"I told you I would make it. So, what did you want to show me?"

"Well, I think he'll be here soon."

He! Wait, wait, wait! What do you mean by he? "S-someone is coming?"

"Umm, I don't know if you would call it coming, but well yeah."

Damn it. Karma was too fast. It had not been one month yet since I played that little prank on her. Was this payback for that time? Though I must admit. It was not farfetched that she had met a nice guy during her travel whom she became close to. Alpha was beautiful. It was more unthinkable that nobody had gotten interested in her.

I sighed. No use in worrying. Alpha had not told me yet if the guy was her boyfriend. I would test the water and judge from her reaction whether my case was already hopeless. I got off my truck and stood beside her.

"About the café, it's done up more properly than I thought," I said. "I'm really surprised."

"Ah, actually, it's only stacked up with boxes and such. It's forbidden to lean on the walls."

"Is that so?" We continued to talk about trivial things. "Alpha, would you like to get in the car? You're dressed too lightly for this kind of weather."

"Um, but if I'm not outside, the person we're waiting for won't notice me."

"Hey, who's coming? Someone I know?" I did not mean to sound apprehensive, but I could not help it.

"I don't think so, but you'll be surprised for sure. Just wait and see."

We both watched the gray sky and let the time pass by. The temperature plummeted fast as the day got late. I glanced at Alpha. She rubbed her hands together and breathed on her palms.

"It's really cold after all," I said.

"I'm still okay for now. Well, this is a bit unprepared of me."

"I'm getting a little chilly, too."

"Ah, then shall we get in the car?"

I did not hesitate. I stepped closer to her, opened my overcoat, and wrapped her with it from behind. She stiffened for a moment. She looked up at me. I could see the red tip of her ear.

"Takahiro…"

"Just the front…a bit cold."

She was quiet for a while, deciding how to respond. "I see."

"You used to do this to me when I was small."

"Yeah."

"You smell the same."

I felt her weight collapsing on my chest as if she was giving up. "Yeah."

"Are you still cold?"

"Not anymore."

The plane zoomed in too close to where we were. I was astounded. I saw that kind of aircraft before in Sensei's library. If I was correct, it was called a T-6. For two minutes, it maneuvered above us. I could not take my eyes away from it.

"He said that the trees of this shrine are a good landmark," Alpha said. "And I thought, 'I want to show this to Takahiro, too.'"

"I want to see it up close," I murmured.

"Yeah. One of these days."

The plane finally flew off into the distance, shaking its wings which Alpha pointed out as the pilot's way of saying goodbye.

"Alpha, thank you."

"You're welcome." She leaned her head on my cheek. We stayed until the sunset.

I hung my overcoat on her shoulders as I escorted her to the car. Alpha curled into the passenger seat and eventually fell asleep. I tucked a loose strand of her hair behind her ear and drove as carefully as I could into the calm and cold evening.

…

I had done my best to gather what I could. For these past two years, I had chased any leads I could use. Sensei saw me off with a ceremony of sorts, telling me that she had nothing to teach me anymore. In bio-robotics theory, she said that I was now standing side by side with the best. I bowed in front of her and gave her my gratitude.

"I will make my dream come true, Sensei. Thank you for all the time you have shared with me."

"I'm very proud you've been my student, Takahiro. I'm looking forward to your accomplishments in the advancement of bio-robotics."

"I won't let you down." I hugged her.

"Here, take this with you." Sensei took out from her drawer a bracelet. Hanging from it was a circular chip painted with her sigil: an abstract impression of the running man. From her pocket, she took out a pack of cigarette and a lighter. "And this is for boring days." She pulled my face to her and kissed my forehead. "Take care of Alpha for me."

"You don't need to ask," I said. It was the last time I saw Sensei.

…

I took Alpha to the old dock. When I was a kid, she had brought me here to relax. It had been the first time I heard from her that she could not eat fish. Another panel of the bridge had sunk down into the water. The encroaching lake reflected back the languid setting of the sun. The Cordillera hid its top under a blanket of white fog. Alpha was thrilled that I invited her.

"Ahhh, it's so cool here," she said. "It's strange, isn't it? I think so whenever I come here."

"Yeah."

"It's not like there's much of a breeze. And it isn't shady."

"Yeah." She was really having fun. I could not do anything but bask in her aura.

"How long has it been since we came here? Two years? Longer? I lent you my scooter."

"Yeah." I sighed. So, it was finally today. The day that I reached the borderline between our worlds.

"It seems like only yesterday. You were so scared of driving."

"Yeah."

"And now, you're the one taking me out for a drive."

"Yeah." I drank my canned juice and laid it down on the pavement. "Alpha."

"Hmm?" She removed her slippers and sat next to me on the edge of the panel.

"I'm going to travel. I cannot satisfy my fascination with machines if I stay here. Around here, there's a limit to how much I can learn about them. I think it's a good opportunity."

She faced me excitedly as if what I had said was the best idea in the world. "It is! That's so great! You're really growing up!"

"To tell the truth, I wasn't sure about it. But I decided to go."

"I think it's a good idea." She looked up, imagining what I would be in the future. "When you get back, you'll be a real adult."

"Yeah. But I don't think I'm going to be coming back."

"Huh? W-what do you mean?"

"I think…I'm probably gonna be on the road most of the time."

She slouched and went to sit facing the water. "To the west? Where?"

"There's an old factory a bit past Mt. Fuji. I think I will stay there for a while."

"That's far."

"Yeah."

"When are you going?"

"The day after tomorrow. There's a bus leaving from Kinagasa."

She was smiling, but her smile did not reach her eyes. "That's sudden."

"Now that I've made up my mind, I think if I don't go soon, I probably won't go at all."

"Yes, you're right." She puffed up her chest and exhaled. "That's right! Well, I'm going to miss you."

"If I can, if I have some spare time, I'll try to visit."

"Good." She looked away from me for a moment, and when she turned back to me, her eyes betrayed what she would do next. She hugged me so tightly my breath caught in my throat. "What can I say? The only thing I'm good at is waiting. So, I'll wait for my little brother. I'll wait as hard as I can."

"Yeah." We were like that for a while until I broke the silence. "Alpha, did you bring your camera?"

"Yes." She took it out from her pocket and put it on my palm.

"Let's take a picture."

"Okay! Oh, yes, I remember we haven't had one together yet."

"Yeah." I moved to her side and leaned towards her. I felt her stiffen for an instant when our shoulders touched. "Ready?" She nodded and looked at the lens. Then I kissed her as I clicked the shutter.

"Taka—"

I kissed her again and clicked. I did this while pushing forward. She supported herself from falling with her hands. She could not move away from me anymore. I kissed her, and kissed her, and kissed her, up to the point where I did not pull away. I kept our lips from separating. I placed the camera down and searched for her hands. I grabbed them, soft as freshly baked pudding. Her mouth tasted like tea, and there was sweetness to it as if she had eaten sugar. I was surprised when she put one of her arms around my neck, the same arm she had used to hug me a while ago as an older sister. Right now, I was her man and her my woman.

"Alpha…"

She locked her arms behind my back and buried her face in my neck. "Don't go! I love you! I love you more than anything in this world. All this time I've been a coward. All this time I have only been forcing myself to see you as a brother. But it is not the truth. I have been crazy for you for a very long time! So please stay! Stay with me!" She kissed me. "I cannot bear to part with you."

Maybe it was wrong of me to make the confession on the day I said goodbye. The truth was I was expecting her to be confused. I was assuming her to agonize about my action and think about why I did it. During that time, I would quietly leave.

"It will never work out. I don't want you to see me grow old while you stay young and beautiful beside me."

She glared at me. "That's just your opinion! How about mine?" She was mad. It was my first time seeing her like that. Her small fists were bunched up on my back, crumpling the fabric of my shirt. Her face was gleaming with tears, and her beautiful mouth that I would like to kiss again was twisted into a snarl. "Why do you have to leave? I can't think of a reason why. Engines? New learning? Are all these more important than me?"

I wanted to tell her my reason for leaving. I wanted to promise that I would come back. But the pain of a broken promise was worse than one that remained unsaid. I was headed to an unknown road, blindly groping for a way to achieve my goal. I was not sure if I could succeed. I did not like the idea of making her wait forever for nothing.

"Alpha, I want you to be happy. There are still a lot of places you have not seen yet. I want you to have the freedom to go there anytime you want. We are the same. I want to explore the world and leave something behind for the future generation. And you, I want you to remember me as I am now, as the young boy who has fallen in love with you."

"You want me to be happy, huh?" She got up and pushed me. "Then why are you hurting me!"

I could not call out to her as she ran away. I stayed there looking at the sky until there was no light left. "I guess I'll be walking back home."

I panicked when I saw my truck at the same location where I had left it earlier. I was sure she would use it and leave me behind. I got in and frantically searched for Alpha. It did not take too long. I found her crouched over her knees, sobbing under a tree.

"Alpha," I said, hunkering in front of her. "Let's go home." I took her hand, but she pulled it away. She was still mad at me. Sighing, I picked her up and hefted her onto my arms.

"Takahiro! Wait!" She struggled, pushing me away, slapping me with her small hands.

"You're so light," I said. I carried her to the front seat. After making sure that she was in a comfortable position, I fastened her seatbelt and got in myself.

We drove in silence.

"Should I carry you inside?" I said once we arrived at her house. Her response was a glare.

She got off and went to the door without looking back. I stood watching her until I could not take it anymore. Even though I had already decided that I would not make any promises, the weight of seeing her hunched back and bowed head pushed my body into motion. I reached out from behind her and confined her in my arms.

I kissed her ear and whispered, "I'll come back, so wait for me." When she did not show any sign of responding, I said, "I love you."

I slowly headed for my truck. As I opened the door, she ran to me and threw herself in my chest. She grabbed my face and kissed me.

Though still hurting, she forced herself to smile. "I'll be waiting. However long it takes, I will be here. It's a promise."

"It's a promise."

She watched me as I drove off. Now whether I succeeded or not, I had no choice but to come back.

…

I first went to the cities to find information not about robotics or artificial life forms, but about the Misago. I learned a lot, but most of them were bordering folklore. I even found evidence of the Misago being worshipped in a small, extinct village in the submerged province of Nara.

I lived for a year in a community of old scientists and engineers that were still hoping for the reemergence of human proliferation. Ironically most of the people in the community were living alone. I asked around if they knew anything about the Water Gods, but they had dismissed these anomalies as mutant plants brought about by the sudden and irreversible geological shifting.

"It's the ocean soil that is now on the surface and the surface soil underneath," said Dr. Akiko Mikasa, a biologist. "They are strange because there was no record of their existence when they were still underwater. You know how we are. We make big things out of small things that we can't explain." She had already accepted this as a fact. Though I could sense in her a lingering frustration from not being able to make sense of the Water God's existence.

The people found it weird that all I asked was either about the Misago or the Water Gods. I already lost count how many times they had asked me why. I told them the same lie over and over: I was trying to write a book. Most of the time it stopped them from prying, but sometimes I could just smile sheepishly when they pointed out how bad I was in grammar to be writing a book.

"A book, huh," Aoshi-san asked me one time. He was an astrophysicist who owned the apartment I was staying at. We were drinking beer outside, watching his daughters play with fireworks. "All the people here are scientists, you idiot. No one believes you. They just ride along because you're the type to never back down even if cornered."

"That hurts, Aoshi-san," I said as I drank from my can. He could be frank with me about it because he treated me like his own son.

"We all know what you are after. People like you come once in a while." He got up and went to the house. When he came back, he placed a tattered notebook in front of me. "This was compiled by one of my ancestors. Hope it helps." He sat back in his chair and chugged his beer. He did not talk for a few minutes. "Takahiro, the last eight pages of that notebook contain the author's regrets. If you don't want to be discouraged, don't read them."

"I'll remember that."

The notebook was a detailed log of a man searching for the Misago. I studied it and memorized its contents. From the first page to the last. I did not listen to Aoshi-san's warning. I did not care. Nothing could sway me at this point.

 _I know she's there, but all I can see is a blurred silhouette. My eyes can't see well anymore. She's in front of me, but I'm already too old to do anything about it. She is so near, and yet I feel like this is the farthest she's ever been from me. What else can I do but to push her away? It hurts so bad, but this is for the best. I hope that she never comes back. I hope that she leaves this old fool for good._

I put the notebook down. It was a tragedy, but instead of discouraging me, it reinforced my notion that the Misago was very kind.

…

Finding where the Misago lived proved to be difficult. The land had changed a lot compared to what it was in the time of Aoshi-san's ancestor. I found some of the landmarks he had described in his log, but seven out of ten of them were gone. I decided to start my own journal, recording the things I saw at the present time. I recorded the events that happened as I walked deeper into the Koajiro forest. I drew new plants and animals I saw for the first time. Every afternoon, I compared my notes to what I had learned from the old man's log. It took me two months to realize that I could not use that learning anymore. I was grateful for the clues, but as I went down even deeper into the Misago's territory, I found them becoming more and more useless.

In the next few months, I taught myself to hunt game and gather edible fruits, leaves, bulbs, and mushrooms. I baited birds with torn pieces of mushrooms. The birds would ignore the poisonous ones and ate the edible ones. I learned how to fish, and I found a place near a river for that. The river was not too wide, but it was calm, a sign that it was very deep. It did not fail to provide me with fish. I continued my search along the river. The Misago would have had built her home near a body of water. And I knew that fish was one of her primary food. The first time we met, two things had burned themselves into my memory: her fanged smile and the wriggling fish she was dragging by the gills with two fingers.

I kept up with this optimistic thinking for a while. Months passed. I hunted, gathered, and fished. I did not stay in one place for more than one night. I traveled from morning till evening, just stopping to eat. The sun and the moon were my compasses. I missed counting some days, so I depended on the change of season to track the year. And just like that, three winters came and went ever since I left home.

Under the canopy of endless darkness, I often saw the Milky Way I used to watch with Sensei on clear nights. It was beautiful, unreachable, and everlasting, like Alpha, like the one I loved. I filled my notebooks with her images I drew painstakingly. I danced with her in my dream. I laughed with her and chatted with her as I had done in the past. I held her hands and kissed her and told her I loved her. This I would always do before I slept.

One afternoon, as I was gathering mushroom, the sky turned gray. Thick clouds rumbled over my head, and they looked close enough to touch. The day before birds had flown south in a big group. I had expected that a storm was coming. I took refuge in the crevice of a big old tree just as the rain began to pour. I thought that it was the typical storm that I experienced annually. But nothing could have prepared me for what came next. I felt the ground tremble and heard a loud rolling sound coming from the north. My eyes widened when I saw it. It was a wall of water twice the height of the tallest spruce tree in the forest rushing over towards me. I just knew I was about to die.

…

I woke up from the tremendous pain in my stomach. I reached out and felt something hard protruding from it. When I looked at my hand, I saw blood. A broken branch had impaled me. I lost consciousness again.

I felt something touching my lips the second time I woke up. A hand gently lifted my head. I realized it was a cup at my lips and there was water in it. The shadow tipped the cup ever so slightly to let me drink. Swallowing was painful, and I coughed up the water on more than two occasions. The shadow whispered something into my ear, but I could not make out what it was saying. I nonetheless tried to drink more until I fell asleep.

It was the same thing over and over. I did not have any idea how long I kept doing it, but whenever I woke up, the shadow was there holding the cup of water to my lips. I drank from the container and managed to say thanks when I could.

One time I heard sounds of patting on the ground. When I opened my eyes, I saw the shadow compacting the soil around a sapling. I did not understand what the sapling was for. I was not that strong yet to keep my lids open. Before I succumbed to sleep, I noticed something curious. The shadow was smiling at me.

I finally got the energy to remain awake for short periods of time, but I still could not eat solid food. The shadow tried to feed me once. I disgorged it. The shadow cleaned me up. It was then that I learned who it was. Her face, her hair, her eyes. The shadow that had been nursing me back to health was the girl I was searching all this time. It was the Misago. I cried. Out of relief, out of joy, I was not sure. But when I saw her familiar figure, I could not stop my tears from falling. Finally. Finally, I found her.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Alpha

I stared through the window while my chin was on the table. My arms were hanging like vines from my shoulders, and my toes were pointing inwards. Anyone who could see me would think that I was having one of those lazy days. If anyone would come, anyway. No one would come in this weather.

It was -9 degrees today. I had wished for snow, but looking at the sky, I just knew it would not happen. It was cold and sunny at the same time. I wondered what Takahiro was doing today. I missed him so much. Whenever I thought of him, that day, the day he had confessed his feelings would always come back. I remembered I had not slept a wink that night. I kept hugging my pillow until the sky turned to light.

It was funny how I concluded that it was love. I had met Takahiro when he was only a kid, and I thought at first that we would be treating each other forever like family. But owner ruined that peaceful thinking by sending me a weird letter one day. "Find a partner that you will cherish more than yourself." It was a difficult instruction. "Partner" was something I did not fully understand. How was I supposed to find a partner? All I could think of was finding someone of the opposite sex with whom I would like to share my life. Marriage was still happening. Courtship was still happening. I knew of the basic idea, but I was not convinced I would be capable of sharing the feeling it entailed.

Takahiro was the closest male in my life and also the closest to my age. It was easy, and it felt right that I considered him as the partner owner wanted me to find. I watched him grow, memorized his tendencies, and studied his likes and dislikes. He did grow fast, and by the time he was thirteen I did feel something change inside of me. I began wanting to be with him more. I casually invited him to stay over to satisfy myself, being careful not to sound too eager or too disinterested. And that one time, when we bathed together, my inhibitions came off. I showed him my naked body, knowing that he was looking. That night I was so embarrassed. I wouldn't have known what I would have done if not for Ojii-san coming over to pick Takahiro up. I did not know if it was a big mistake on my part, but since that day, I just knew that Takahiro had not looked at me as an older sister anymore.

"Sorry for the intrusion."

The sudden greeting startled me. I almost toppled over my chair. My hand went to the holster on my belt. But before I could pull my handgun out, I recognized the person standing at the door. "Kokone!"

"H-hello. I'm sorry I let myself in." She had taken a step back as if to dodge. I had never been more embarrassed in front of her.

"No, no, no! I was at fault. I did not hear you."

"You seem to be in deep thought."

"It's just…yeah! Watermelons! Don't you think it's unfair that we can harvest watermelons only during summer?"

Kokone tilted her head in confusion. She raised her brow and gave me a condescending smile. "Did I come at a bad time?"

"No, no, not at all!" Kokone did not come at a bad time. It was more accurate to say that I was not expecting her to visit me in this kind of weather. "Well, umm…coffee?"

Kokone sat down at the same table where I had been lounging. The weak sunlight struck her purple hair.

"So, Takahiro is really gone," Kokone said.

I choked on my coffee and coughed. Kokone went over behind me to pat my back.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes. I'm sorry," I said. "Somebody must have thought of me."

"Takahiro?" Kokone teased.

I puffed my cheeks at her.

She went back to her seat and took a sip from her cup. "Things will be quieter around here."

"Yeah." It was almost too quiet to bear. If not for Kokone, I would have stared out the window all afternoon, daydreaming.

"It was hard for me to believe what you wrote in your letter."

"Same here."

"But I'm happy for you. I envy you because your feelings for each other are mutual."

"Yeah."

She smiled, took a sip from her cup, and stared out the window. Then she took my hands and looked intently into my eyes. "Don't waste this chance. I can say that I am well read about our kind, but this is the first time I've known of a robot that has experienced love. I don't know what Takahiro is trying to do by leaving you behind, but all I can say is, if waiting becomes too painful, go and find him."

Do you know the feeling of restlessness when you want to share with someone your thoughts about something incredible? Like seeing a red eclipse for instance? When Takahiro confessed to me, I experienced that restlessness. I wrote to Kokone about this, asking her to write back what she felt about it. I had never expected her to visit me and tell me face to face. I was happy she did. I looked at her and grabbed her hands.

"Then, let me tell you everything," I said.

…

It was summer again. I decided to go outside since I knew no one would come today. I had not seen Ojii-san for a while. This would be an excellent time to visit. Besides, I had got a good harvest from my vegetable garden, and I had been thinking of giving some to him. Ojii-san was resting under his shed when I arrived on my scooter. The cool breeze swayed the chime hanging from the roof. The whole place seemed to glow white under the intense summer sun.

"Hello!" I called out.

"Hey!"

"You seem cool in there."

"It's dang hot!"

"I grew these eggplants and okra. These are for you."

"Well, look at that! Thank you. How about you take some watermelons, too?"

"Umm, today, I don't think so."

"Oh? Well, I'll take the truck and drop some off tonight."

"Well, thank you. Though it's fine, really."

"Nope, you need to take at least one." He went to take a stick of cigarette out of his pack, but he put it back. "By the way, I only got kerosene right now, see. I'll have gasoline the day after tomorrow or thereabouts. You should be stingy with using gas till then."

"Got it."

Ojii-san got up and sliced a watermelon. It was sweet and juicy as it had always been. There was no one passing by. The road ahead shimmered, and the air at its surface flickered like water. Now and then a warm breeze would pass through our shed.

"Ojii-san."

"Hmm?"

"Have you gotten a letter or something from Takahiro?"

"Nah, nothing. A boy that age don't send nothing."

"Oh."

We fell silent. I finished two slices of watermelons in that span of time, but I noticed Ojii-san's first was still only half eaten. I looked at his hands. There were more wrinkles in them, and the skin had sagged in places. His hair did not have any black strand anymore.

"Someday, Makki's gonna leave too," he said.

"Yeah."

"When that happens, there won't be nothing but geezers for ten kilometers in any direction. Except for you."

I understood that, but it would have been better if he did not say it out loud. "When you look at Takahiro and Makki-chan, you understand how time flies."

"Yeah. That Taka, just before he left, it suddenly seemed that he was an adult."

"R-really?" My face got hot, and not because of the heat.

"He got these determined eyes on him like he was motivated by something. I even thought he was doing it for a girl."

"Y-yeah." I wished he would change the subject.

"Alpha, listen here."

"Y-yes!"

"Sooner or later, it's gonna get even quieter around here. I think you noticed. The waves are coming up your place."

"Yeah."

"You should move in and open your shop here. It's high enough here. You can stay as long as you like."

Why did I suddenly feel that Ojii-san was leaving as well? I looked at him, thought it through, asked myself what he really meant.

"That is, if it's okay with you," Ojii-san said.

"Thank…" I wanted to say thank you, but the words were caught in my throat. I could not go on. The sobs came, and I tried to suppress it by hiding my face in my knees. A warm hand pressed on my head.

"Well, that's still a ways off. And I got the feeling that Takahiro will be here for you."

I squeezed my arms and listened to my heart as the wish in Ojii-san's words pierced through it.

…

I turned over the cup in my hands and wiped its bottom. I turned it over again and wiped its mouth. It had started raining thirty minutes ago. And also it was already dusk. No more customers would come today. I began walking towards the door to flip the sign. When I pulled the door open, Makki was there, standing in the rain and drenched all over.

"Makki, what are you doing? Come inside, quick!" She did not give any sign of budging, so I grabbed her wrist and dragged her inside. "You will get sick! Wait here."

I dried her with a towel and asked her to change into the clothes I had brought. She obeyed without complaint. I sat her down at the table nearest the heater and made coffee for the both of us. I watched her as she stared at the table.

"Makki, what's going on?"

Makki sneered. It was the first time I saw that expression on her. "I was planning to go into a fight with you."

"Huh? What for?"

She sighed. "As I thought. You are pretty calm about it."

If she were still thirteen, I would have no reason to prod her on. But Makki was already eighteen years old. I could not dismiss what she said as an attempt at playful banter.

"It has been three years since Takahiro left. But this is the first time I learned of his true feelings."

"T-true feelings?"

"Don't be unfair. Stop playing stupid. Do you love him?"

I was stumped. I did not have an immediate reply. "W-what do you mean?"

She wiped her eyes with her fist. "Tell me, or I won't be able to move on."

I could not say it. I did not want to hurt her.

"I've always loved Takahiro," Makki said. "Until now, I'm still hoping that we end up together. You told me before that you liked him, but it was impossible for you to have a relationship with him because you were a robot and he was a human. I want to know how you truly feel."

I looked up and turned towards the window. The scenery wavered as if I was looking through crying eyes. "I do love him. I don't really care about petty things like him growing old on me. I want him to be with me for the rest of his life."

"So greedy."

"What!"

"I'm kidding." Makki let out a big sigh. When she looked up, she was smiling. "I can rest easy now. I'm planning to leave and work in the city. I just had to clear things up with you. Sorry if I troubled you."

I shook my head and tried to return her smile, but I just couldn't come up with a sincere one. I did not want her to leave, too. "When are you leaving?"

"Maybe the day after tomorrow. I was packing my things when I found this." She took a small voice recorder from her pocket and clicked it on.

"Don't go! I love you! I love you more than anything in this world. All this time I've been a coward. All this time I have only been forcing myself to see you as a brother. But it is not the truth. I have been crazy for you for a very long time! So please stay! Stay with me! I cannot bear to part with you."

I could feel steam coming off my head. I snatched the recorder and threw it to the wall.

"I believe he intentionally left it for me to find. I confessed to him once and told him that whoever he liked should like him in return or else I would stick with him forever. He did not give me an answer that time. I think this is his answer. I've known for a long time that you are the girl he likes. But I indulged in that false hope that you would never like him in return."

"I told you that I liked him," I said in a small voice.

"True, but I was a kid back then and the way you said it did not give me anything to worry about. I would not have accepted that I was wrong if it was not for that record." Makki glanced down at her cup. "Hey, my coffee is cold."

"Sorry!"

As I poured her another cup, she said, "Let me stay here tonight."

Makki slept with me in my bed, the first time she had accepted my offer. She snuggled close and wrapped her arms around me. Once I woke up to her sobs. I steeled myself. It was not that I did not sympathize with her. I just felt it was the right thing to do.

…

I woke up catching for breath one morning. It was the first time in my life that I felt an ominous chill down my spine. I looked around and found myself in the same room I had woken up in every day, but something was changed. I knew there was. I was unsure what, but it was there, that nipping sensation that my life was not the same as before. I got off the bed and wondered what time it was. The clock said it was fifteen minutes past six. I frowned. It was dimmer than usual. I pulled the curtains and peered outside. Dark clouds had gathered from the east, thick and low, pregnant with rain. The trees and the grass swayed in the wind. It would be a big typhoon.

"So, it really came."

I went outside and rechecked the planks I had put yesterday together with Ojii-san. Everything was secured. I was not about to let another typhoon wreck my store. I might have to buy new roof panels afterward, but I swore the damage would be minimal. At least I hoped so.

I went back inside, and halfway to the counter, the lights went off. In time with that, the rain poured. I rummaged the drawers for candles and found one unopened box tucked with matches. I lit three candles, sticking them atop inverted cups. I placed one on the counter and one on the shoe-shelf. The last one I carried around with me. I made myself a cup of coffee and sat down at the window. The typhoon raged outside. Through the mist, I watched as the rain swept the hills in every direction. The wind shook the windows, but I was not worried about them ever breaking. One of my most extravagant expenses during my store renovation was installing bullet-proof glass for my windows. Even amidst typhoons, I did not have to cover them with planks.

"Takahiro, are you well? Did you find shelter in time?" I asked. I was half-hoping he would reply, like how it was possible through magic in the fairy tales I had read.

Sometime later, I dozed off. I woke up after three hours. My arm was numb. The typhoon had not let up. Leaves had clung to my windows, and water had seeped through the gaskets of the sills. I got up, cleaned my cup, and went to bed to continue my sleep. I was at peace, quite the contrary of what I had felt in the morning. I lay in my bed and listened to the creak of my walls and roof. I thought I would fall asleep in an instant, but it was awhile before I did.

The typhoon lasted until noon the next morning. Leaves and branches littered my yard. As I had expected, two panels of my roof had been pried back and were gaping like the lid of a can of beans. I checked the planks on the storage room and the windows at the back of the house and found that they were still in place. It seemed that the typhoon was not strong enough to do that much of damage. I started picking up the stray branches. I gathered them into a pyramid. After a time, I had collected so much I decided to make myself a bonfire tonight, in celebration of the typhoon's departure. I swept the leaves and all other combustible trash I could find towards the makeshift pyramid I had made. I finished cleaning my yard in time for the sunset. Satisfied, I went inside and took a bag of marshmallows from my "emergency supply" cabinet. I made myself some coffee, and while the water was boiling, carried a footstool in front of the pyramid. Once done, I lugged a tea table out the shop and placed the coffee set on it. Then I began skewering the marshmallows with barbecue sticks.

Just in time for my third plate of roasted marshmallows, I glanced up to the chug of the truck coming from the dirt road. I was too familiar with the quirky rumble of the vehicle not to know who it was. The headlights hit me as it pulled over outside the gate. Ojii-san and Sensei got off and waved at me. I ran over to welcome them, surprised and excited at their unexpected visit.

"Holding up alright?" Ojii-san said. "Oh, my. It looks like the roof needs a bit of work. No worries. I'll come by tomorrow and help you fix it."

"Thank you," I said.

"Here, Alpha, I brought some snacks and drinks," Sensei said. "I got the feeling you'd do something like this."

"It's just a spur of the moment," I said. "I didn't have any idea where to put all those branches. Just wait a bit. I'll bring you seats."

Sensei had brought homemade fish and squid crackers. As it turned out, a lot of these had been washed ashore by the typhoon. Ojii-san had the same reason when he brought out a plastic container of takoyaki paste. I helped him carry his old takoyaki cooker from his truck, and as he bragged about how he had been a great takoyaki artisan in his younger years, he made us the most delicious takoyaki I had ever tasted. Ojii-san was considerate enough to make mine without the squid bits. We enjoyed the food with cold beer Sensei had brought along in an ice box. Ojii-san told us that he would be closing his gas station for a couple of weeks to repair some damages the typhoon had inflicted. Sensei shared a story of a typhoon that had destroyed her family's house when she was a kid. Ojii-san talked about tasks at hand that needed to be done. Sensei talked about the past that needed to be remembered. They had so much to share, so much to talk about. And though it might incur some contempt from other people, for the first time in my life, I was grateful for a typhoon.

…

I borrowed Ojii-san's truck the next morning to buy new roof panels. "I'll go with you," Ojii-san offered, which I accepted with thanks. The ride to Yokohama was a quiet one. I noticed that Ojii-san did not talk much and instead looked out and watched the scenery from the window. The day was still gray. Clouds covered the sky. They only parted on select locations to let the sunshine through. I didn't particularly hate this kind of weather. There was wind, and the temperature was comfortable. The pillars of sunlight that pierced through the clouds presented a magnificent view as if we were inside an enormous temple made of gold. I always watched out for rainbows after the rain, but these pillars of light brought another kind of satisfaction to me.

"I'm glad I came," Ojii-san said. "I might never have another chance of enjoying this sight while riding a car."

"I could drive you anytime you want."

"Old man's too busy to be playin' hooky. Besides, I can't trouble you when you have your shop to attend to."

"Don't worry. Lately, I only get customers once a week."

"That so?"

Ojii-san stayed behind while I went to the hardware to purchase the roof panels. The owner asked me to wait for a few minutes while he prepared my order. His wife brought me some iced tea and cookies, to my surprise. She was middle-aged, fat, and could have been as pretty as Kokone when she was young.

"I baked too much, and no one here to finish them," she said. "That your grandpa? Better if he joined us, what do you think?"

I raised my hand to call out to him, but then I stopped midway. Ojii-san seemed to be entranced in watching the people around us. He watched as if he was required to remember every detail. He watched as if it was his first time, intensely as if it was his last.

"No. I think it's better if we let him be for now. Can I take home some of these for him?"

The owner's wife stared at Ojii-san. When she turned to me, her smile was warm. "I'll wrap up a big serving just for him." Before leaving, she patted my head. "I'll be right back."

After we got all the things we needed for the repairs, we again shared a quiet ride home. We had an early lunch in my shop before we started. I did not hear Ojii-san grumble even though I could tell that every swing of the hammer hurt his back. I made it a point to take a break every twenty minutes. When I noticed that Ojii-san was panting, I asked him to stop. He just smiled at me, stood up, and resumed where he had left off. I watched him closely. That was all I could do. Though I was worried about his health, I could not bring myself to take away something that he enjoyed doing. Before long, we completed our work. I brought out the soup I had stowed in the fridge to chill. Ojii-san ended up asking for seconds, twice.

I went back inside the house to start making coffee. I carried the kettle outside with two cups and the cookies the hardware owner's wife had shared with us. Ojii-san snored lightly in his chair which faced the west, his back on the shop's wall. I tiptoed towards the table, set down the coffee set as silently as I could, poured myself a cup as silently as I could, and walked towards the rail as silently as I could. I observed Ojii-san as he slept. I traced the lines on his wrinkled forehead, around his mouth, on the corners of his eyes, and on his cheeks. I realized that he had been with me longer than Owner. A memory snapped back at me, Takahiro's words. He had told me once that he did not want me to see him as he grew old. Looking at Ojii-san now, I felt for the first time that those words were not only meant for him. Hidden deep within was a warning: it would hurt really bad even for me.

"Oh, I'm sorry I fell asleep. Maybe it's time I go home," Ojii-san said.

"I'll drive you home."

"Nope. You stay here with the truck. I'll ride my bicycle to wash away the sleep. Haven't closed my shop yet."

"Okay. I'll visit you tomorrow."

Ojii-san patted my head. "You take care of yourself. You wait here for Takahiro. I'm sure he'll come back one of these days."

"Okay. Thank you so much for your help with the roof."

"You would have done it well even without me." He inspected my face and gave me a large grin. "I must go now."

"Take care."

"Yup."

I cleaned up the table after I saw off Ojii-san. In the end, he had not touched the cookies. They had become a bit soft because of exposure but still edible. I collected them into a plastic container and promised myself that I would take them with me tomorrow when I visited Ojii-san. While I was busy with the task, I thought I heard someone calling my name. I turned around and stared at the dirt road ahead. Something felt wrong. I dropped the plastic container as I rushed outside. My feet didn't stop running until I saw Ojii-san lying curled on the ground. He had fallen off his bicycle. He had a fist clenched at his heart.

"Ojii-san? Ojii-san, are you alright?"

He was gone. As soon as I touched him, I knew I was too late. I could not remember what happened afterward. Everything just went blank. When I opened my eyes, I was not in my room.

I remembered the place. It was the room I had woken up in when I was struck by lightning many years ago. As if to confirm it, Sensei greeted me at the door. My eyes welled up at the sight of her. When she was near enough, I embraced her tightly.

"Sensei," I said. "It hurts so much."

"It's alright. Everything will be fine."

"No! Nothing will be fine. Ojii-san…Ojii-san is gone. It's my fault. I didn't think he would really die. Sensei, I don't want to feel this way again. I don't want this immortal body anymore. Please, please make me human."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Takahiro

It was a few days after the incident. I could finally sit on my own. I also got my complete consciousness back, as I could now smell myself. I had gotten familiar with the inside of the cave. A few feet away the sapling had taken root and was growing strong. A clump of baby leaves had sprouted from its stem. To my left was a broken refrigerator, its corners brown with rust. The tree which had impaled me the day of the typhoon rested in silence behind me. Some of its branches had been chopped off. I remembered the Misago going off with an armful of them into this one big tunnel and coming back with four grilled fish on skewers.

I looked up at the patch of sky I could see from where I was. The sunlight could only reach up to the middle of the shaft, a sign that it was still too early. The Misago spoke something in a language I couldn't understand. But I was pretty sure it was a language. She was giving me a fish. Like the first time I saw her, she was naked and seemed not to care that I could see everything. Strangely, though, I didn't feel anything inappropriate. I took the fish she had offered and ate while watching her. She was all smiles, and when she noticed me staring, she grinned at me. I was the one who got embarrassed in the end, so I focused all my attention on my food.

After the satisfying meal, I began to inspect the shaft. It was made of steel. I knocked on it, and it returned a dull sound, evidence of its thickness. I couldn't see any footholds or gaps at all. Climbing would be impossible. The Misago said something and pointed at the tree. She gestured that the tree would eventually grow up to reach the top of the shaft. I stared at her in disbelief. That would take decades. Was she insane? She shrugged, stood up, and stretched. I shook my head at her. I looked up at the chamber once more and arrived at the conclusion that people had operated this place in the past. There must be a source of power somewhere to light the whole thing. I hoped that the lighting system still worked, otherwise, I was doomed to spend my days only in places where the sunlight reached. In other words, I would have nowhere else to go but the shaft.

I attempted making a torch out of the branches, but the fire wouldn't last. So, I tore my shirt, wrapped it at the tip of one stave, and lit it. The torch worked for less than five minutes before its flame died. I was again at square one and now half-naked. Despite my repeated failures, I didn't give up. I churned my brain to come up with something. Then I caught sight of the broken fridge. The fridge's door was only hanging on a single hinge, and I detached it from its body with a single kick. I gathered as much kindling as I could, stacked them on the fridge's door, and lit it, creating a miniature bonfire. I pulled the cables off the back of the refrigerator and tied it on the door's handle to serve as my tether. I was not thinking straight, and I was not about to stop when there was a big possibility that I might find a way out of this hole. If this was an underground, man-made facility, it should have at least a set of stairs up to the surface. I didn't realize that my bonfire was creating so much smoke, and I could die of suffocation in the tunnel. So much for a graduate of bio-robotics engineering. Fortunately, the Misago came with a bowl of water and doused my bonfire. She shook her head at me as if I had lost my mind and dragged me to one shallow alcove where a black glass panel lay under the sun. It was a solar panel and connected to it were two electric torches.

The Misago and I explored the tunnels, or more accurately, I explored the tunnel. The Misago seemed to be familiar with the place. She slipped into the darkness like it was nothing and appeared when I least expected her. I told her not to do that because I might accidentally hit her out of surprise. She just grinned at me, not comprehending anything I said. I was the one who made the adjustment and employed a considerable presence of mind to catch my fist every time she popped up from nowhere.

There were two things I noticed during our exploration of the cave: the plaque of sediment on the wall and barnacles on the ceiling. Their presence only told me one thing. This place had been submerged in water for a long time and was recently drained of it. In my estimate, it must have only been a year, give or take. I entered one of the first rooms, and it was massive. There was a long table at the center of the room and toppled chairs around it, but nothing more. The drawers and the shelves were empty. The occupants of this place must have gotten an early warning to clear out before the tragedy struck. The other six rooms next to it were virtually the same. I was glad I did not find a single skeleton lying around.

Beyond the massive six rooms, there was a tee junction. I took the right passage and arrived at what I thought was the employees' quarters. The rooms were big enough for one bed and one bathroom. I counted eight of these, and similar to the first rooms, all were empty. I went on deeper and reached what seemed to be the dining area. There were a counter and scattered tables and chairs on the floor. Light was spilling through the gap of the door next to the counter. I opened it. It led me to a hallway with a big hole in the wall. The hole's inwardly curving edges were a clear sign that the water had entered from there. The rest of the way was covered in rocks that must have been initially the ceiling. I stood in the hole and looked outside. I could see nothing but sea. I went back and tried the other way. I arrived at an inclined tunnel flooded with seawater. The flood came only up to my knees, so I tried wading through it. The path gradually ascended until I reached a quay outside of the tunnel. A cliff flanked the quay on either side. I couldn't make out the top of the cliff because of the low clouds, but I was sure it was as high as the steel shaft. I turned to face the sea and watched the sun for a few minutes before I returned inside. I tried exploring the next day and the day after that just to be sure, but it was useless. I didn't find any stairs, ladders, or the vehicles I had read about which were called elevators. The only means of ingress and egress to and from this place was by sea. It took some time before I completely accepted the fact that I was trapped. Ironically, at the same day, the Misago managed to find the main switch of the facility. As I stood in one of the dark hallways ready to cry, the lights came on.

One day the Misago took me to a trap door inside one of the rooms in the employees' quarters. One of the higher-ups must have lived in this room because it was a bit bigger than the rest and had a corner desk installed on the wall. We descended the ladder and arrived at a large dressing room. The cabinets were filled with clothes. There were T-shirts, work jeans, black pants, and navy-blue coats with four-star shoulder marks. Socks and handkerchiefs were folded neatly in a corner, but I couldn't find a single shoe. I changed immediately into a pair of work jeans, discarding my tattered and stinky pants. I was more comfortable without a shirt on, and the Misago didn't mind, so I reserved the shirts for later. I also found blankets, pillows, and bedsheets in the bottom drawers. I offered a set to the Misago, but she shook her head. I climbed out of the trap door, went to the second room in the area, and fixed the bed. The Misago entered the room and jumped onto the bed, rolling like a kid. I was thankful that the mattress had not been destroyed by the flood.

Two weeks passed, and I was on the quay again, trying to calculate my chances if I attempted to climb the cliff barehanded. Deciding that it was worth another attempt, I began climbing. Approximately ten meters from the ground, I could find no footholds anymore like how it usually ended. Since the day I made my bed, I had been going through this repeated cycle of failures. I already searched every nook of the facility, but I hadn't found anything that could be useful for climbing. I toyed with the idea of stringing up all the available clothes into a rope, but without any pikes, it would be a waste of good clothes.

For the first few days, the Misago had been the one providing food for the both of us. But I thought that I should get my own food from now on. I followed the Misago early in the morning when she was about to go to sea to catch fish. I stopped her and tried to tell her I wanted to learn how to fish underwater. She tilted her head and ran into the facility. When she came back, she held a sharpened metal stick. While I was inspecting the stick, she dove into the water and beckoned me to follow. I took a deep breath and jumped in. She was like a fish. While I was struggling to control my lungs and thinking of a way to move efficiently, she already caught one fish with her stick. I saw the cloud of blood from the fish as she raised it up for me to see. She returned to shore and was back in the water in no time for her second round. I could only stare in awe. We decided to return before the sun was at its peak. She caught six fishes in total. I caught two crabs.

I engaged the Misago in conversation whenever I could. She showed interest in my words, but I knew she couldn't understand me. She was more of a facial expression reader. She smiled or clapped her hands when I talked about happy things. She hunched her shoulders when I talked about sad things. She had a lot of facial expressions, and I liked watching her when she was trying to tell me something with her alien tongue. I couldn't understand anything she said, but she used big gestures and animated reenactments that the unfamiliarity of her words did not matter so much. I even began to look forward to our chats. But things, of course, did not go smoothly. Not getting what the other wanted to say frustrated us both. There was a time that she spat off a string of gibberish at me that I wouldn't interpret as anything else but insults. I would not deny that I went off calling her an idiot on numerous occasions, too. The majority of our talks were pleasant enough that removing them from our lives just because of a few occasional disagreements would be such a waste. However, I still thought that I should put forth some effort to learn her language for both our sakes. Besides, I wanted to ask her about her longevity, and I wouldn't have any progress if I didn't break the language barrier. So, a day after our latest shouting match, I brought a canteen to her and gestured to my ears. What do you call this thing?

Call it a sign of being a sore loser. Call it a childish denial of the truth. I couldn't let it go just like that despite my repeated failures. This was the last day I attempted to climb up the white cliff. I scaled the cliff wall as carefully as I could, not looking down or thinking how much time had elapsed. Miraculously, I managed to find footholds until late in the afternoon. This meant that I was already approximately five times as high as my best record of about ten meters. I kept my eyes trained at the top, giddy with anticipation that my final attempt would work. It was when the sun was about to set that the jutting rock in my left hand I was pulling my body on gave in to my weight. The sudden pressure of losing my grip traveled down to the footholds under my feet. These footholds collapsed, and I began to fall. Time stretched abnormally long like a friend who was intent on listening to all the things I wanted to confess. Ironically, I could only utter one single line. "I'm sorry, Alpha." Before I hit the ground, knowing I'd probably die, I regretted being impatient. I was quickly progressing with my language lessons with the Misago, and I knew it would be a matter of time before I could uncover the truth regarding her immortality. But my emotions were too powerful for me to control. When I made contact with the ground, there was no pain. Only the sudden disappearance of light.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Alpha

I pestered Sensei every day until she finally gave in. She told me that she might know of a way to grant my wish, but she didn't have the necessary tools to perform the procedure. I asked her that I would go and get it for her, but she just shook her head at me.

"We need to get to the Taapon," Sensei said. "It's where your big sister is."

"You mean the spaceship?"

"Yes. We need to travel to Riho Island where it was launched fifty years ago."

"Riho Island?"

"It is a man-made island where we created your big sister, A7M1. That's the only place where we can contact the Taapon. It will be a long journey, so gather all the things that you might need. We will leave town after a week."

I passed by Ojii-san's gas station on my way home. He used to sit in his folding chair, smoking his cigarette and reading his newspaper, while waiting for customers. Now there was no one here. The windows were sealed by wooden planks. Pinned on the door was a handwritten note that said, "Owned by Alpha Hatsuseno." It was Sensei's idea. People would recognize my name better, she said. Makki was not planning on coming back, and Takahiro had been gone for over three years. My name was to ensure that the station's patrons would look after the place even if I were away. On the gasoline stand, there was another note that said "No gas." It would be a long time before somebody manned this place again. I would suggest to Takahiro that we moved here. I would renovate the front of the building into a café. That way I could also offer refreshments to the customers that went here to buy gasoline.

"Hang on for a bit, okay?" I told the gas station. "I'll come back soon."

I had been living with Sensei until yesterday. I was there when we took Ojii-san's body to the crematory and sprinkled his ashes into the sea. It was a solemn event attended by Ojii-san's friends. Sensei told me that we couldn't hold what she called a "funeral" because there was no one available who could perform the process which was called "embalming." Ojii-san's body wouldn't have lasted long before it began to decay. Sensei immediately went around town on her truck and spread the news. A middle-aged man, who introduced himself as Takuya, had come back with Sensei. Takuya-san made a simple plywood box after taking Ojii-san's measurements. Once he finished with its construction, he carried Ojii-san's body and placed it gently in the box. Then Takuya-san and Sensei lifted the plywood box onto the back of her truck.

Takuya-san said, "The old man has gotten lighter since the last time we met. I carried him on my back once when he hurt his hips, and he was maybe heavier by five pounds."

We went to the crematory together. Takuya-san got off at his house and fetched his motorbike. There were houses that we passed by, and from each one, another person on a motorcycle would tail behind the truck. I was moved by the scene, especially when their number swelled to thirty. I couldn't stop my tears from coming when Sensei turned onto a street, and I saw people waiting at their gates, hands in their chests and praying.

"With these many people who love him, I'm sure his soul can easily find peace," Sensei said.

"I also want to have a soul," I said.

"You would not have felt sadness if you didn't have one."

"But I'm not human."

"It's not a criterion, Alpha. You are as human as anyone can be."

I knew what Sensei was trying to say, but I felt it passing over my head. I just couldn't think of myself as a human being, especially now that I experienced what losing a loved one meant. It meant that if I stayed as I was, a robot, the people I loved would leave me behind, and I would never be able to go wherever it was they were going. Takahiro might be able to give me another seventy years, but after that, it would be a permanent goodbye. It already hurt thinking about it.

We pulled over at the foot of a hill with our entourage. Four men went to our truck to get Ojii-san's coffin, and with them leading the way, we climbed up the inclined path to the crematory. A brick building stood on top of the hill overlooking the ocean. Sensei and the four men entered the building. I chose to remain outside. The others began laying blankets at the area that caught most of the view, and Asuka-san, a middle-aged woman who managed a dairy farm, went around pouring sake for each of us. We waited for three hours before Ojii-san's cremation was over. As the sun rose up, Sensei tilted the urn containing Ojii-san's ashes towards the sea, and the white powder scattered in the wind.

Seeing the lights in my café pulled me back from my reverie. I found at the door a pinned note that said, "Sorry for the intrusion-Aki & Ako." These twins were my regular customers. I went inside and was welcomed by a tidy café. I remembered that I hadn't been able to tidy up the place during the frantic hours of the incident with Ojii-san. I also hadn't had the time to go back or much of a motivation to think of the café in the past week. I went to check the fridge, and after seeing it full of fruits, I couldn't help letting out a sob. It was sweet of them to do this much for me.

"Thank you," I said.

The week passed by unnoticed. I performed the last inspection of my house, checking the planks on the windows, the locks on the doors, and anything that would cause a fire. It was not my intention to keep robbers away because such crimes only existed in books nowadays. The world had grown tired of strife and conflict. If I ever had to be thankful for anything about the state of the world right now, it would be how natural people had become living in harmony with each other. Everyone searched for a way to improve the life of another. This cycle came and went and was never broken. I was grateful that I got to observe the world as it was a little longer because of my immortal body. But the thought of being not a part of the cycle, being an outsider, being the only one who was not allowed to connect was gradually chafing at my feelings of appreciation. Add to it my longing to have Takahiro by my side forever, and the whole thing became unbearable. So, no, my precautionary measures were not to prevent theft. It was to stop nature from destroying my house and reminding me that I was not subject to its power of change.

"It took me a few days before I managed to inform all the families," Sensei said. She was pertaining to the families who relied on her for medical service. "I found a good doctor in town whom they could consult if something came up." She glanced at my trolley bag. "I think we're ready to go. I'll get my things inside and then we're gone."

I watched Sensei at the wheel when I grew tired of the quiet scenery outside. She knew I was watching her, but besides a single glance my way to see what I was up to, she ignored me. Sensei was never a chatty person. It might be because of her being a doctor where listening to her patients was a big part of her job. The quiet didn't bother me, anyway, so I mostly kept to myself during the trip. Sensei pulled over at a hill a little after one o'clock in the afternoon and told me that it was time for lunch. Using a portable stove that worked on a two-liter LPG tank, she heated the food she had prepared this morning. We climbed up the hill and sat down under the shade of a tree surrounded by white outcrops. In front of us lay a group of conical islands amidst blue-green water.

"This place used to be farmland thirty years ago," Sensei said. "Those islands you see over there were hilltops. I used to go here to pilfer some apples when I was young." Sensei pointed at a spot nearest the shore. "See over there? That was an apple orchard many years ago. Look, the apple trees are still visible even from here." I saw them, rows of dead apple trees under the water. Their trunks were white.

"I used to ride my bike a lot," Sensei said. "I dropped by this place every time to get an apple from the overhanging branches along the property fence. The owner always got angry with me, not because I was stealing the apples, but because I was too lazy to go inside and ask for one. I miss those times. Now, this place is mostly water, and apples don't taste as good as before."

We encountered a lot of dead ends along the way. I caught Sensei sighing each time she saw that the road ahead was submerged in water. Sensei and I did a lot of camping on roadsides during this time. There was almost zero traffic so we could still get a good night sleep even if we were close to the road. Sensei told me that there had been a time in the past when the roads were so busy you could hear one passing vehicle every two seconds. I couldn't imagine it. In this era, one vehicle in two days would already seem a too generous estimate.

"I was also born too late to see that, personally," Sensei said. "But I believe it would have been impossible camping out like this if the volume of traffic were like that."

"Yeah," I said, wriggling inside my sleeping bag to fix the position of my back on the truck bed. "And the air would have smelled like gas fumes."

"Alpha, don't you want to see how the world will turn out a century from now?"

"It will be meaningless if I don't have anyone to share it with."

"I'm sure you will meet a lot of wonderful people in the future."

I turned to Sensei. There was something in her tone that I found out of place. "It will not be the same as sharing it with friends that I've known in this generation."

Sensei smiled. "Have you fallen in love, Alpha?"

"Sensei!" My body jerked up, but my sleeping bag held me in place. "It's not like that, okay! I mean all of my friends."

"It's not something to be flustered over," Sensei said. "So, who is the lucky guy?"

"Geez, Sensei, I told you it's not like that." Sensei continued looking at the sky as if she knew I was trying to avoid the subject. "Takahiro."

"Hmm?"

"It's Takahiro."

"I see."

"It just happened suddenly," I said. "I don't know how to explain it. When he told me he loved me, I realized that I felt the same way. I was afraid that something in me was malfunctioning."

"It's not something bad." Sensei turned her head to me. "It's natural."

"Even if I'm a robot?"

"When we were at the design stage of the A7 Series, no one believed that androids could learn how to empathize, that the best thing you could do was try and mimic what you saw in us, humans. It was the prevailing bias in those days. But we designed your system in such a way that you would naturally develop complex human emotions over time. Feeling love is within your capacity."

"But, Sensei, did you expect a robot to fall in love with a human?"

Sensei chuckled. "Honestly, no. It may be that your development is too advanced, or Takahiro is too special."

"See? Maybe one of your colleagues input a bug in my system. Maybe what I feel for Takahiro is preprogrammed."

"Are you afraid that everything has only been an illusion?"

"Yes."

"Do you think Takahiro would have fallen for you if you were just some humanoid puppet?"

"I don't know."

"Alpha, humanity's age is coming to an end. Our survival methods have become inefficient. Our lifespans have become too short for the current world. Any time soon, humans will cease to exist. You are the children that humanity will leave behind to oversee the future. And the most important requirement to ensure a successful transition is for your kind to have a free will." Sensei reached over to hold my hand. "What you feel for Takahiro is as real as this wrinkled hand of mine."

When we arrived in the city, we immediately rented an apartment for two weeks. Sensei said that she needed to ask some of her friends to help out in her preparation for the procedure. Most of the time, I was left alone in the two-room accommodation. I decided to visit Kokone on the third day when I couldn't take the boredom anymore. She had given me her address the last time she came to my place.

"This is too sudden, geez!" Kokone said. "It's only seven o'clock! You could have come a bit later, you know."

"Sorry, sorry," I said and raised the bagels and the paper cups of coffee in my hands. "I brought some breakfast. Mind if I come in?"

Kokone gaped as she realized that she was blocking the entrance. "Of course! Come in, come in," she said.

This was my second time inside Kokone's cramped but cozy room. Kokone heated up her leftover pasta, and we ate it with the bagels. Kokone took the paper cups from me and poured their contents into two ceramic mugs: a purple one and a green one. She handed me the green one. I saw an orange mug, too, and she told me it was for Maruko, a third-generation female robot whom she had met in this city. We talked about inconsequential things and current on-goings in our respective towns. She was overwhelmed with emotion when I told her about Ojii-san's passing, and she promised that she would visit his grave within the month.

"It's part of the reason Sensei and I are traveling right now," I said. "You see, Sensei may be able to make me human."

"What do you mean make you human? That's physically impossible!"

"Of course, it's not like she will alter my body. She will only tweak some of my core parts to cause my body to age."

"But, Alpha, you don't have to do this. The procedure sounds risky."

"Sensei assured me that there is nothing to worry about. She's one of our creators, after all."

"You love him that much?"

"Yes."

"Takahiro will never approve of this."

"Kokone, I'm afraid to lose him. I feel like it is the one thing I will never be able to bear. I'm sorry."

Kokone stared at me for a long time before she spoke. "I understand. I really really really hope it goes well. Tell me everything when you get back, okay?"

Sensei did not come back to the apartment for ten days. I only received a letter from her telling me not to wait for her for dinner. On the eleventh day, Sensei arrived in a car with a middle-aged man who introduced himself as Aoshi. He pulled out from his bag a dirty notebook and a knapsack that seemed to have been salvaged from mud. I just stared at Aoshi-san until Sensei held my hand and told me what the things he was holding out signified. After Aoshi-san took his leave, Sensei asked me if I was still planning to proceed with the operation. I said yes. Sensei pulled me into her thin arms and embraced me. I felt a sting at the root of my spine, and then I fainted. I couldn't remember what occurred after that. When I came to, I was in a white room and only wearing a medical gown. Sensei was sitting on a stool beside my bed. She began to talk about the things that had happened since Aoshi-san's visit. When she finished, I began to cry.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Takahiro

I opened my eyes to the cold touch of a solid object on my lips. At my side was the Misago, supporting my head while holding a cup to my mouth. She was smiling, but I could make out the anxiety in her eyes. I stared at her for a while as if not recognizing who she was.

"I'm still alive, huh?" I said.

She replied with her strange language. I couldn't understand most of what she was saying, but I caught the word for "climb" and "idiot" in her lecture. It was obvious she was angry for what I had done, and she was trying to express it in a way where I could still infer her meaning despite her alien words.

"I'm sorry I made you worry," I said. "Thank you for taking care of me."

From that day on, my days became a routine, and I knew I was gradually getting older. I began to avoid looking at my reflection, afraid of what I might see. I focused all my attention on the things outside of me. I even learned to give only fleeting glances to my hands and feet. I felt like an idiot, but who cared? I was just an ordinary kid who wanted to be immortal. Not seeing how my hair turned white and my skin developed wrinkles was at least a kind of net that kept me away from despair. The Misago refused to leave my side since my accident, so I took advantage of it. I talked with her, ate with her, and became close to her. It was an arduous and slow process, but it was worth it. It helped me accept the fact that I was trapped and the only way out was the growing tree at the center of the shaft.

I realized one day that I was conversing with the Misago in her language. When did I learn it? Time surely flew by so fast. The only thing I was sure of was it had already been several years since I fell into the shaft. The Misago said that her language was called English, and before the Great Tide, it was the most widely used language in the world. A once-in-a-million-years gravitational disturbance caused the moon to move abnormally close to Earth, which messed up the tidal patterns of the oceans. The resulting tragedy was called the Great Tide. Though the moon regained its natural distance from the Earth after fifteen years, the water lingered on land. Some scientists theorized that the celestial pull broke an enormous aquifer beneath the Earth's crust, but nobody could prove it. The Great Tide had sunk a large area of habitable land and with it two-thirds of the world's population. It exposed the ocean beds and submerged mountains, shoved islands and melted ice. Eighty percent of the animal kingdom became extinct due to the ensuing changes in the climate. Human civilization managed to live on, but the destruction of almost all the major energy production facilities and resources in the planet plunged it into a technological regression that was unheard of. After twenty years since the Great Tide, the human population further decreased to only around fifty million, and from there it continued to decline.

The Misago was, in fact, the first humanoid robot capable of thinking for herself. She was born in a nation called the United States of America during the time she called the Artificial Intelligence Epoch. It was fifty years before the Great Tide. After she was introduced to the world, other nations rushed to make their self-governing androids. In less than twenty years, the androids' population inflated so much that the United Nations, which according to the Misago was the primary arbitrator for global issues, signed a universal agreement declaring androids as part of the human race with equal rights, duties, and responsibilities. The agreement resulted in significant changes in the world's cultural, economic, and religious standards, and according to the Misago, it was the cause of the bloodiest and most protracted World War in the history of humankind. The Misago said that the Great Tide must have been nature's way of fixing the chaos and bringing back peace. It just went a little overboard.

The common androids were made of cells from tiny structures called nanomachines, which made them entirely artificial. However, the Misago was different. Nanomachines made up forty percent of her body, but the rest was made up of a substance called Kalis. Kalis came from a subaquatic plant that was discovered in the Marianas Trench by a radical scientist in the Philippines. The Misago described the Marianas Trench as the deepest part of the world's oceans in that period of history. The radical scientist, Pablo Gomez, named the subaquatic plant as Dios del Agua. It was what we knew as a Water God in the present day.

"The Alpha series was created using the same concept as mine," the Misago said. "But since the technology of manufacturing nanomachines was lost after the Great Tide, the modern androids were made using titanium frames, fiber optic nerves, and Kalis. The coffee shop girl is one of them."

I felt my chest constrict at the mention of Alpha. She must have already found a partner by now, an android boy that wouldn't grow old, unlike me.

"Father had used his DNA as my blueprint. He sold his discovery to America because his country did not have the money or the technology to explore it further. But his American team adored and respected him so much they gave him all the credits of my creation amidst his protests. My brown skin is a testament to the blood we share. And my face is almost identical to his, so you're virtually meeting him right now through me."

"I never thought that Sensei's assumption was wrong."

"About what?"

"She thought you were not a robot, but the last human being of the old world."

"No one can blame her. All significant records of my creation were destroyed in the flood."

I became a good diver, and I became as good as the Misago in catching fish. I improved the time I was able to hold my breath under the water, and I reached the level where I could swim for hours non-stop. Several times I tried to search for a way up the sheer cliffs, but I always failed. There was nothing but the same smooth, white surface all around, and I was not about to risk another climb. After a while, I gave up and accepted that my only hope of seeing land again was the tree at the shaft.

I could feel that my sense of time was gone because a year was now as short as a day for me. The growth of the tree suddenly seemed a lot faster than before. The highest branch had already reached two-thirds of the shaft's height without me noticing it. But what was the use? I knew I was an old man. Since I had decided to discard my clothes and walk buck naked as the Misago, the white hair on my crotch hadn't failed to remind me. Strangely enough, my skin still looked young. It didn't mean a thing to me. I once had seen an old man that seemed like only in his thirties except for his white hair. It was about the genes. Some looked younger than their age. I must have been one. Of course, I rejected the idea of checking my face on the water. I had never looked at my face since the day I decided not to do it. I wouldn't be able to take it.

I had expected it to happen sooner or later. Our friendly and playful frolicking heightened and became sexual. When I realized what was happening, I was so ashamed of myself that I did not talk with the Misago for a long time. I ate alone. I avoided her gaze. I could see the frustration on her face at my sudden change of behavior. I apologized to her internally. I couldn't live with the guilt of lusting over her young body. The Misago was beautiful. The way she moved was like that of a cat. If I lost focus even for an instant, if she finally had it and stood close, I knew I would jump her. The damage would be irreversible. I would tarnish her. I would destroy myself.

I felt a body on top of me one early morning. When I opened my eyes, it was the Misago. I couldn't see her face, because the sun had not risen high enough yet. Only a sixth of the shaft was illuminated.

"What are you doing?" I said.

"It's not you who should be asking that. I've had enough of your attitude."

"Please get off me."

"No. I can't take it anymore!" She took my lips. Despite of my reluctance, I found myself kissing back. "I know you feel the same, Takahiro."

It was the first time she called me by my name. I stared at her. If I still had my youth, it wouldn't matter so much. We would be on equal grounds. We would be selling our bodies and desires at the same price. She was young and pretty. I was old and disgusting. It was unfair.

"Take me. Take me, Takahiro," she said. "Give me my first experience."

"I'm an old man," I said. I couldn't take away my eyes from her.

She kissed me again. "I'm older than you."

I got caught up in her passion, and before long, I was returning her kiss. I rolled her onto her back while ravaging her mouth. She grabbed my head with her arms and my abdomen with her legs. The next thing I knew, I was inside her, thrusting my hips into her most precious part, getting cramps in my stomach because of so much pleasure. Her moans and my grunts echoed off the shaft. I let it loose inside her, and she came washing it down with her own. It could be from my accumulated frustrations or her stamina, but our bodies were both unable to stop. The most extended break we agreed on was as long as the time it took us to finish a single fish. And then we were at it again until it got dark. We lay side by side when we couldn't move anymore. She pointed at the tree and grinned at me. A few branches were hanging over the lip of the shaft. I shook my head and weakly smiled. Yeah, I knew. I did not have a use for it anymore. I would spend here the few remaining years of my life with this beautiful girl.

"Someone is waiting for you," she said.

I kissed her on the cheek. "I can't show up like this."

She looked me in the eye and grinned. Faintly reflected in her irises was my white hair. Thankfully it was dark enough that I couldn't make out my face.

"Do you still love her?" she said.

"I'm not even sure if I still remember her face correctly."

"It's not an answer."

"Alright! Yes! I still love her!"

"Good."

"Goddamn it. Why do you have to bring that up?"

She rolled to her side and put her arm and leg over me. "Let's sleep. You have a long day tomorrow."

I woke up when I felt the sun on my skin. The Misago was not beside me. I sat up and rubbed my eyes, looking around. I called out her name, but only an echo replied. I looked up at the tree. The leaves were sparkling under the sun. It was probably noon. I waited and waited, but the Misago didn't show up that day.

I began to worry when the third day came, and she still had not appeared. Could she have left? I stared at the little sky I could catch through the end of the shaft. It was now possible to climb out anytime, but I didn't feel like trying. I searched all the rooms in the cave and didn't find a trace of her. Time was once again becoming palpable now that I was alone. I carved down each morning on the shaft's wall. Seeing the three rows of days ever stretching upward like a sadistic smile finally made me explode. I hurled my obsidian rock at the tree at the center of the shaft, bellowing curses in the air. I slumped down after a few minutes of venting and stared at my obsidian rock. It was then that I saw a recessed part in the tree's trunk. What I found in the niche was a translucent Water God. It eerily resembled the Misago. But it was not the Water God's similarity to the Misago that caught me off guard. It was my reflection on its skin. I stood frozen when I realized that the man staring back at me from the Water God's skin was as young as the boy who had left his village to search for immortality. Clutching my chest, I took a step back from the Water God. And that was when my eyes caught the engraved inscription on the tree's bark.

 _Takahiro, do you remember the day you fell in the shaft? Your second life began on that day, your second, everlasting life. You probably had a working hypothesis already at that time. And you probably got a passing glimpse of how this whole thing worked when I told you about the Kalis. If you think that it has something to do with the Water Gods, you are correct. It doesn't happen all the time, and I saw many times how it accelerated death, instead. But when I found how mortally wounded you were, I knew I didn't have anything to lose, so I made you drink some of its sap. Miraculously, you survived. Now, even if you fall from that height again, or you try to kill yourself, or you get blown apart, one way or another, you will be revived, and of course, you will never grow old. That's the gift of the Kalis which is now a part of you._

 _It was only yesterday that I learned how hopelessly idiotic you are. I mean, how in the world can someone miss something so obvious? I was already ready to burst out laughing when you refused me because you thought that you were an old man. But I'd also like to apologize for taking advantage of that. Don't get me wrong. I was just too aroused to pass up the chance. No strings attached, and I don't have that kind of feelings for you, okay? Besides, I think it's a fitting payment for what you owe me._

 _Anyway, our tree is now grown up, and you can go back to whoever is waiting for you. Don't conclude things based on what you imagine. You already wasted a lifetime doing that in here. See for yourself and only then can you make your final action. As for me, I'm going to see how the world turned out after eighty years of being cooped up in this cave with you. We will probably never see each other again._

 _Goodbye, Takahiro. I had fun. I hope you did, too._

 _Melissa Gomez._

I searched around to find more, but that was all there was. I sat down in front of the Water God. I never left that spot for three days until severe hunger forced me to get something to eat. I caught myself a fish and didn't bother to cook it. I had days like that when I wanted the pure taste of the sea in my mouth. I remembered the dying baby fox biting a Water God, and then the same baby fox came back healthy but with white hair. I blinked, turned to look at the Water God in the trunk of the tree, turned back to contemplate my fish, shook my head, and resumed eating. After seven days, I decided that the Misago—Melissa—would never come back. I scrubbed myself clean and dressed in black T-shirt and work jeans I had found in the officer's room. The clothes felt funny against my skin after all the years of trotting buck naked. Early the next morning, I left the cave without turning back. I never saw the Misago again.

I was overwhelmed by the should-be familiar scenery that I had not seen in over a century. The dense foliage and giant trunks of trees threatened to suffocate me. The soil was wet with dew, and dry leaves lay on top of it like a carpet. I strolled through the forest, crunching the leaves under my feet. In reaction to it, birds chirped after every intrusion of the sound. It took me several days to reach the plains and another week to find my first village. The roads had changed, and there were taller grass and a lot more ruins. But somehow, I saw more people and houses. I kept going until I finally arrived at our old gas station. The refueling stands were recently painted in white and red, and there were two now. The one thing that caught my attention was the absence of gasoline smell that had been ever present when I was a kid. I turned my head to the café where our old shack used to be and saw a young woman with purple hair pushing a wheelchair with a very old grandma in it. The grandma had red earrings that glittered under the fluorescent lamps, and the way her hair was prepped to one side reminded me of only one person.

"No…" I muttered as I approached. The young woman was about to say something but stopped herself when I put my arms around grandma. "Alpha, sorry I took so long."

"Umm, excuse me, sir?" The young woman said. "You see, I think you've mistaken Makki-oba-chan for someone else."

"Wait, did you say Makki?"

A cup fell and broke on the floor inside the café. A woman came rushing out.

"Takahiro…" said the woman.

I couldn't say anything. I stood frozen in place, unable to blink. Alpha came running to me. She embraced me so tight I thought my body would break. She wailed in my shoulder, calling my name over and over again. It was the familiar smell of her hair, the same lavender scent, that shattered my paralysis. I embraced her back and said, "I'm home."

…

I told Alpha everything. I made sure that nothing was left to feel guilty about in front of her. Alpha also told me all the things I missed during my eighty-year absence. She told me about Ojii-san's passing, the failed operation to make her human, and how she had lived in the city like an empty shell for several years afterward.

"When Sensei told me that the operation failed, I didn't know how to move on," Alpha said, gripping my hand tighter as we walked towards her house by the sea where she still ran her old café. "At that time, a part of me had already accepted that you were dead. I heard that Aoshi-san and a select few of his colleagues tried to search for you for months after the typhoon, but they were only able to bring back a notebook and a knapsack.

"For a year, I lived off the kindness of my friends. There was Kokone, Maruko, and Sensei. There was also Nai. I thought that my system was undergoing breakdown and I would die soon. I was even hoping for it to hurry up so that I could stop being a burden to my friends. It was the lowest point of my life. And it was all because of you." She playfully glared at me.

"Kokone volunteered to move here permanently to take care of me," Alpha went on. "Without her, I don't know what would have happened to me. She took care of all the chores at home while I spent my days on long walks, trying to understand my feelings. Kokone decided to close the café to keep a better eye on me. It was quite embarrassing, but Sensei shouldered all our living expenses. I became quite the baby who even needed someone to lie next to me in bed at night.

"Nai began visiting me here after a few months, bringing all sorts of gifts to cheer me up. It was quite annoying, to tell you the truth, because, during that time, I wanted to be left alone. But he persisted. He's a quiet guy, you see, but he still tried his best to make conversation with me. No one dared, not even Kokone, who was mindful of her words around me. I came to the point where I looked forward to seeing him."

"We formed a sort of a relationship, and it lasted for several months. But in the end, it didn't work out. He was the reason, really. I thought I was beginning to forget about you, and I was starting to get used to the idea of spending my life with him. But one day, he asked me out of nowhere if I still loved you. He already knew what my answer would be, but he still went on to ask about it. I told him, yes, and he could never replace you in my heart." Alpha smiled and looked up at the sky. "You know what his reply was? 'Then why are you trying to act like you don't?' That's what he said. Why was I trying to act like I didn't?

"Hearing those words was like a wakeup call for me. I remembered my promise to you that I would wait however long it took. I knew there was the possibility that you were already gone, that you would never be able to come back however desperately I wished for it. But I decided to deal with the pain when it came. And so here I am."

"I couldn't even do that much," I said. "I concluded early on that I would die before I could go out of that shaft. I even slept with the Misago because I thought that there was no chance that I could see you again."

Alpha pulled me to a stop. "I was in a similar episode, too. I almost did the same with Nai if he did not stop me. Look, Takahiro, there's nothing more important to me than having you back. I don't care if you did it with the Misago, okay? Besides, she saved your life and made you immortal. It's more than enough compensation for me for that one time."

"But…"

Alpha leaned close and kissed me. "Were you trying to say that it was more than that? That you actually fell in love with the Misago?"

"No, no, of course not! You're the only girl I've ever loved, okay?"

"Really?"

I pulled her into an embrace. "I'm sorry. I won't bring that up anymore."

"Good."

I kissed her. "I love you."

Alpha smiled. "And I love you, too. By the way, I can eat meat now, though not that much. Kokone said that she was planning to cook some shrimp today…"

As I savor Alpha's soft hand in mine, my eyes strayed to the shadow of the forest. I caught sight of a Water God tinted in orange by the sunset. I smiled at it and whispered my thanks.

The End


End file.
